Writing this in advance, as I have not been able to write for days. Today, I looked back over my last entries; I could not remember penning them. Well, you were hard on me too, 2022. I anticipated your arrival as the new clean slate for me to start afresh. I embraced you with naïve hopes and my other year of redemption.
2020 – Broke me so bad. I never
expected that it would crush my heart so mercilessly that I even lost hope in myself.
As I welcomed 2021, I prayed so bad and I promised to let you go and move on.
2021 – It was a bit of sunshine, blessings
showered. The best thing I ever did was to walk away from the toxic people who
are making my world more miserable than it needs to be. I have surrounded myself
with good people. Let myself be loved. However, it was so difficult. I tried my
best to forgive everyone and everything for the times I spent within confining
in my four walls, wondering when it would end. I forgive you for how you broke my
heart knowing that somehow, one day, it would all make sense. It was time to be resilient.
2022 – I am done romancing you. I
am so done blaming myself. I am done being stuck in a rut. I want to move on
with my life again. I am picking up the pieces left behind. Slowly, surely. I am
making a conscious effort to make more self-care into my daily routine. I am
trying to eat healthier and even cook healthier, build BETTER connections, and
cultivate consistent habits, knowing that a little goes a long way.
I am always looking for the silver
lining beneath every dark cloud and grateful for all that I have. I am coping
the best I can under the current circumstances and I am so happy with my progress
of how far I have come. I made many mistakes too. I guess, you just taught me
what really mattered. You made me choose to let go of things that I do not
understand either.
2023 – I pray you would be better
than this year. More opportunities and blessings to share with good people.
To wrap it up. Here I am saying
goodbye to 2022, including the people who disregard and shut off my emotions.
People who act like you do not have the right to be sad. I will be stronger. I
will be wiser. I will say goodbye to those who always take advantage of
my soft heart. I will say goodbye to people who pressure me into doing whatever
they believe is best. This is my life. I will save myself and love myself first.
I will ignore all people who give
me backhanded compliments and nasty looks. People who made me feel small and
inferior. I pray to ultimately live a happy life. I pray that my family is
always in a good place. I pray not to be hard on myself that I am just human. I
pray to get more peace and healing. I pray that love catches me this time. A love
that is so tender and kind. The love that I really deserve. Thank you and bye
2022.